Category Archives: Baseball

Emails from Scott: Red Sox vs Astros

If you haven’t noticed yet, either because you’re living under a rock, or you have no interest in baseball and no friends who have an interest in baseball (in which case, I am so so sorry for you) – it’s getting to be baseball time. Pitchers and catchers have reported, Spring Training is underway, and some people are starting to get a little rabid about it.

Having been born and raised in Houston, the Astros are my team; heartbreaking though that often is. I have a fondness for the A’s, due in part to their having Longhorn alum and total hottie Huston Street on their team at the time my baseball obsession began. That fondness has wained somewhat, but JoeSpeaker helps to keep it alive, plus they’re in my new hood more or less. But my secondary team, really, is the Red Sox. Part HBO endlessly playing Fever Pitch during that year this all started, part best friend/boss who was obsessed with the team and would from time to time suggest leaving the office early in order to make it to the bar to watch the Red Sox play. Also there was the cell phone ring tone and the constant score updates. All uber helpful for dating a guy from the Boston area; the groundwork for my fandom having already been laid. Though Scott is not content for the Red Sox to take the #2 slot.

April eventually you are going to have to cut the Astros out of your life. They are like a bad boyfriend that comes over to your house at 2 am after a night of drinking. They are going to fuck you and not call you again until they are drunk. After they leave you there in a pile of unsatisfied womanhood they are going to take all the cash out of your wallet, kick your dog, raid your fridge and steal your panties to show to their friends. They are no good.

Life with the Red Sox is not always satisfying but when they get it right it is the sweetest love making ever. After they are done they offer to make you breakfast while you take a shower and even tidy up the living room for you. Yeah they might not call you everyday but when they do it is special, they remember your birthday. I get why you are hesitant, you have been with the Astros for so long that you think it is ok what they do to you. You think it is not their fault, it is somehow your fault when they hurt you. April you are better than that. You deserve a team with a great pitching staff. You deserve a team that made GREAT offseason moves. You deserve a team that has plugged all their holes in the infield and has gotten the entire roster healthy and ready for the season.

April life between now and October doesn’t have to hurt. It is time for you to let them go and start anew. Red Sox nation is here for you with open arms, willing to accept you and will never bring up your past.

Make the switch April.

I’m not sure if the Red Sox are hiring for a marketing coordinator, but DAMN they should at least consider Scott as an intern.

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silence means security silence means approval

So… Halverson is now posting more frequently than I am?

I should be ashamed.

I’ve got posts, they’re just unfinished, and the time to complete them never seems to find itself. [Lame Blogger Excuse #10010; I know] Things will get good around here again soon, I promise.

But look! This past weekend I fulfilled a very important obligation as Aunt April and took Baby to his first baseball game –


Sadly, the Astros lost (in typical “let’s play like crap the whole game then omg it’s the 9th here let’s suddenly turn awesome” fashion) but they were playing the Diamondbacks, Baby’s mother’s favorite team; so it was all good – as I said to her at the bottom of the 7th, “Deep down I know you’re really happy with the score.”


Yes, Baby has a real name. No, we do not use it.


Never too early to get him trained on the joys of a bottle at the ballpark. Kid outdrank me!

Conversation(s) of the Day

DP: you’ve got competition
April: *gasp*
April: you just ruined my entire day
DP: haha
April: i mean seriously*
DP: well, i’m enjoying it more now looking some of those pics…
April: like, looking for the nearest bridge
April: i can’t believe you would do this to me
DP: well, better i do it than you walking in on them making out at a bar
April: i’m not sure i can get over this betrayal
April: see if i wear his t-shirt this Friday!

Scott: wow that pic looks nothing like you

Roomie: Leave it to DP to be aware the minute something like that hits the interwebs.

*No, not seriously. It was instead the last honest LOL moment I had before the day took a complete 180.